Things Can Only Get Wetter

We have now reached the dog days of theyear’s; the temperature has risen to its
yearly zenith. Like a tidal rhythm the heat has roared and surged upwards for one last punishing blast prior to the arrival of the monsoon rains which will kiss of Cambodia sometime soon, please, please.

This last, wilful blast from the furnace has pushed the temperature up into the bragging zone which is all very cheery if your mission in life is to sip coconut juice on a beach but it can be a morose and wearying struggle here in Phnom Penh.

Last week we had a couple more 42 degree days and I had the quite astonishing experience of Khmers telling me that it was just ‘too hot to work.’ This is rather like an Eskimo phoning up his boss and saying that he’s not coming out of the igloo today because the weather is a bit nippy. Of course this has to be balanced by the happy sight of other Khmers braving the searing heat in their best woolly fleece lined jackets.

For barangs, this kind of heat can have an enfeebling effect, making one either want to die or fall asleep and Phnom Penh last week seemed to full of bedraggled and humiliated whities rushing around from one air-conditioned pod to the next whilst trying not to get their pink skins toasted in the insufferable heat.

My theory around this sudden change in temperature is that it is not wholly unconnected to the sharp rise in the number of NGO types to be seen feeding from the Cambodian lentil trough. It is quite possible that the sheer volume of bullshit coming from them has gradually burnt a hole in the ozone layer.

Whilst wilting in my favourite watering hole last week I got into conversation with a friend much admired for his observation of, and keen insight into the follies of Western NGO’s and he regaled me with a story which, I feel, sums up the relationship International NGO’s have with Cambodia.

Firstly, we have a project (with seemingly laudable aims) being initiated between a Khmer Government Ministry and a bank well known for its involvement in development issues. A figure of around $11 million for the two year project is arrived at. Even at this stage however, the bank wants rewarding for its involvement in initiating the scam and a few million dollars are therefore shaved off in various fees.

Next, an expensive base needs to be found in Phnom Penh and this has to be kitted out to Western standards.Then a dozen or so ‘consultants’ and ‘advisors’ need recruiting from North America and Europe. All of these ladies and gentlemen will be on high end Western salaries. They will all need housing in luxury colonial properties for the duration of their two year contracts and will obviously receive a sparking new land cruiser and chauffer each. And we have not even begun to talk about expenses and ‘per diem’ yet.

So the budget is shaved by a few more million dollars.

Now all the whities are sitting comfortably at the lentil trough, the local staff can be recruited.

Obviously, these guys don’t cost $400 per hour (plus expenses) but there are a hundred of them on the payroll and they all have to be provided with a motor scooter each.

Lastly we need to buy our specialised equipment which does not come cheap and has to be shipped over from Europe which means that the somewhat diminished figure of about $1 million is left over to actually ‘do the work’ for the duration of the contract. And all this is assuming that no local corruption has taken place at any level.

This leads me to an inescapable and apocalyptic conclusion.
It has become clear that most of the supposed aid money coming into Cambodia merely passes through the country before finding its way back to the USA and Europe and whilst local corruption quite obviously does take place (or how else would that civil servant on a salary of $300 per month be able to throw a $10,000 birthday party for his 12 year old son…) it only happens after the banks, consultants and advisors have calmly but forensically skimmed the pot of its cream.

And we now reach the finale. It transpires that the $11 million provided for this project is actually a loan. Every single cent of it is added to the national debt and will have to be paid back with interest by the Khmers.
It is a bit like inviting somebody into your house, giving them free board and lodgings, letting them loaf around on your sofa drinking your beer and channel hopping all day and then giving them a hefty monthly paycheque. In return, they kindly agree to pay your cleaner's local salary each few weeks.

So next time you see a fat air conditioned Land Cruiser pulling up outside Java Café, remember that the $500 dollar an hour 'consultant' inside is being sponsored and paid for in full by a provincial rice picker earning $1 a day. And it all makes perfect sense.